Bittersweet...

Is it just me or is this year flying by and bringing about lots of changes? I mean how can it possibly be May already?

I guess since we got the "hey drop your life and fly to Peru" phone call I feel like things have just been crazy for us. I knew the New Jersey job was coming but I was counting on having so much more time at home and that didn't happen. I kept telling myself to be grateful for what we did have here while others were on the Peru job for a whole year... having said that I have to say I try really hard not to compare our situation to others because ours is what it is and theirs is what it is. We planned for time off, we didn't want to go to Peru and now more then ever I am glad that we didn't because Jason couldn't have hated it more. We sacrifice things to be able to take time off when we want and that is what works for us. We went to Peru and Jason worked and honestly for us it was bonus money we weren't counting on.. so great I guess... but for me it was less about the bonus money and more about the time we lost somewhere I love.. home.

While we were in Peru I got an email from a dear friend of ours who you often hear about on this ol' blog.. The Seavey's! Brianne emailed me to tell me that after a lot of soul searching and consideration they had decided to sell their house and move back to Maine. I'm not going to lie my heart sunk.. I wrote her back and said truthfully that I needed some time to process what I had just read and would get back to her with questions.

You see Evan and Brianne are near and dear to our hearts.. Jason grew up with Evan and went to college with him and we we met Brianne (or I did, Jason knew her growing up) not long after Evan and Brianne started dating and have been close ever since. Evan has lived down here in North Carolina since college, he did his co-op here through school and was offered a great job with Progress Energy right out of school, he bought a house down here and has been here ever since. When Evan and Brianne got serious she and her two kids moved down here to be with Evan and start their life together. We were suppose to go on a cruise together not long after that and then all our immigration crap started and we couldn't go, while on that cruise Evan and Brianne got engaged and we couldn't have been happier for them!

Jason was in Evan and Brianne's wedding the July that followed and it was an amazing day, we couldn't have been happier for them. 3 months after the wedding Jason and I were in Toronto as Jason was doing some warranty work on a plant down there and we received the worst call of our lives.. Evan and Brianne had been in a terrible car accident and they didn't think Evan would make it. I kid you not the months that followed were worse then I could have imagined. Evan suffered more injuries then I care to sit here and go through, because although it has been 3 years since the accident I still cant sit and talk about it without sobbing.. oh how life can be so unfair.

Evan is lucky to be alive, and there is not a day that goes by that I don't thank god for that. To say his existent is a miracle is the understatement of the century. But life changed, Evan suffered a traumatic brain injury and since then nothing has been quite the same. We couldn't be more thankful for what is but in all honesty as close as we are to them, we are still on the outside looking in. Evan no longer works and probably never will... and that is fine but it definitely changes their situation in many ways.

While in Alaska I received a call one day.. extremely early in the morning from Brianne. I knew something was up and in all honestly after the accident I held a lot of fear. I feared for Evan's health, I feared every time Jason left the house what could happen, I was scared. I saw things over the course of Evan's hospital that no one should ever see, I faced a reality that although not directly mine took a piece of my heart and put a scary realization in my head.. tomorrow is not a promise nor a guarantee. I feared what Brianne was calling about because although Evan's is healthy today considering all his surgeries there are complications that can arise at anytime.. I couldn't have been more relieved to hear that Brianne and Evan were expecting a baby.

Right before the accident they had been trying in hopes of a family of their own and obviously things abruptly changed, we could not have been happier to hear the news. When we left Alaska and were on vacation in Hawaii I received a text from Brianne that she was dilated and the baby could arrive at any time. I begged and pleaded with her (because its really within her control) to hold out that we would be there in less then a week and so badly wanted to be apart of this miracle joining the world. Well low and behold we showed up and Brianne was still VERY pregnant and remained that way after our departure!

Amelia was born less then a week later, all 10lbs of her.. let me tell you she is her Daddy! We couldn't have been happier and were anxious to meet this beautiful little girl.

Moving to Raleigh has been a gift in many ways, but in large part we have got to watch this beautiful girl grow. With hectic lives I sadly have not seen Millie G (Amelia Grace) since our February visit and  to say I was anxious to get down there on Friday was an understatement.. but let me tell you, it was bittersweet. Evan and Brianne are leaving on June 10th and Jason is due to start work on May 19th. They are currently selling their house and obviously we have stuff going on, so seeing each other again may just not happen as hard as that is to accept. Because of the house selling we arrived down there only to find out there was a showing so we met them for dinner at a near by restaurant. I'm not going to lie if we were not in a restaurant I may have shed a tear or 500 when I saw that beautiful girl.. where does time go? Sadly my heart broke a little more knowing that its been a few short months since I have seen her and good lord how she has changed, what will we miss when they are more then an hour away?

We cherish our time with the Seavey's and their kids, and there are no words to tell you just how much we will miss them. Having said that with the technology that exists today all contact is not lost... but sadly I find not much solace in that right now. Life changes sometimes, beyond your control and I guess you just have to make the best of it. Selfishly I think this SUCKS and I hate that they will be so far and when we come home we won't see them, unselfishly I know this is the best decision for them and because of that I couldn't be happier. Amelia is amazing.. there is no words for this little girls amazing easy going, happy go lucky disposition and Brianne and Evan's extended family deserve to know her, see her face to face all the time and experience her sheer delight.... but man I will miss it!

I mean honestly.. look at her...

Be still my heart. 

Her hair got so long....

"I'll take that..." she was desperate for my phone every time she saw it. I however will take full responsibility for that as we had her for 4 days in January and I taught her how to use it, since then she has been addicted... but who could blame her?

Kids love Jason, and usually Amelia does too but she went back and forth with Jason this trip.. she just wasn't sure about him.

I mean first thing in the morning, hung over and all how can you not just want to kiss that face?

Fuzzy picture.. thank you Iphone.. but PB&J sandwiches had to be eaten! Again she was right after my phone.

We bought her a little Muskoka chair for the summer, I mean how perfect? She sat in that thing every chance she got, inside and out!

I so badly wanted to hug and squeeze her every chance I got, she was konked out for a good 2 hours before we left and we waited and waited in hopes of saying goodbye. Literally as we were going out the door she finally woke up and we were able to kiss that face enough to hopefully get us through until the next time. 

New Jersey is not that far from Maine, and you make time where it counts and if anything this is it. I am thankful for Amelia everyday and the time we got to spend in her first year of life and watch her grow.. it was a privilege! We wish the Seavey's all the luck and goodness this new adventure will bring them and we will miss them more then words. 

So before I completely ruin the rest of my night by sobbing hysterically as I write this I am moving on! Tomorrow we will be back to our Peru post, I think we are left with about two. If y'all have any questions or something please leave comments and I would be happy to answer them. The deck with any luck will be done tomorrow and I so look forward to sharing pictures of that with you. We have a list of things that need to be done around the house and it is my intention to get on calling about apartments tomorrow although let me tell you I really don't friggin' want to! 

Tonight Tanya and Josh depart Peru for good and are heading to Florida for some much needed time off! Sending them wishes of a safe flight and enjoyable time off! They have been in Peru over a year and leaving behind a life they have established and friends they have made.. I know what that's like and I hope they are looking forward to all the amazing adventures ahead! Sending lots of love their way! 

So that's my scoop, Evan totally screwed with my drinking groove Friday night and introduced my to a 'Southern Sipper' I really shouldn't have mixed them with beer because I ended up quite drunk which doesn't really ever happen. I woke up Saturday morning feeling like I might just die.. and think I came close! None the less I had a shower and put my big girl pants on and got on with the day! We didn't do much yesterday as we got home later in the afternoon and headed to bed early! 

We have been outside most of the day today, it is absolutely GORGEOUS out there and is looking to be all week.. I absolutely cannot wait! I am headed out now to help with dinner! 

Departing wish many wishes of the happiest of birthday to Ethan today! Hope you liked your present, we hope 13 is a wonderful year for you! We love you tons!